3 Powerful Affirmations for Emotional Balance
The taller a tree grows without an established root base, the more vulnerable it becomes to external circumstances like the weather.
When the winds blow, rain pours, or the hot sun is out, the tree can’t keep its center and draw its nutrients effectively; consequently, it could either break or not grow to its full potential.
This metaphor beautifully mirrors our quest for finding emotional balance. Just as a tree needs strong roots, being emotionally balanced requires a solid internal foundation.
Those of us who struggle with feeling “too much” or all over the place without having an anchor within ourselves run the risk of forgetting who we are, what’s in front of us, or what we need to do.
Here are three powerful affirmations for emotional balance that have been helpful for me and my therapy clients in building a balanced relationship with our emotions so that the roots run deep and wide.
Affirmation for Emotional Balance #1:
I HAVE feelings, but I AM NOT my feelings.
Some of us have personality types that tend to overidentify with our feelings (I’m looking at y’all, Enneagram 2s and Enneagram Fours). Out of the belief that, “I am how I feel”, these folks tend to give way too much emphasis on wanting to be known, understood, and loved for how they’re feeling.
What’s the issue? They are often emotionally impulsive and fluctuating, making it difficult to stick to a healthy rhythm and causing drama in relationships. They have a habit of getting stuck in feelings as if feelings are EVERYTHING, overlooking other aspects of life that are just as important (e.g., moving their body, getting work done, discerning what’s the practically appropriate decision to make, making good but unpopular decisions) .
(Not hating on y’all feeling types…As a heart type myself, I just wish I knew this emotional balance mantra earlier in my life. Would have saved me a lot of unnecessary heartache…)
You HAVE a hand, but are NOT your hand. You have other parts of your body that are also essential. If you’re just a hand, you’re NOT ALIVE.
In the same way, you HAVE feelings but are NOT your feelings. Don’t make your feelings your identity or who you are. They are an essential part of you, but they’re not ALL of who you are. You are SO MUCH MORE than your feelings.
What are other parts to you? We are ALL heart, head, and body. If you want to be emotionally balanced, focus on the other two:
Your HEAD (THINKING)
Practice considering topics and making decisions according to what is OBJECTIVE, not subjective. What literal data points are you considering?
Practice not taking things personally, but focusing on seeing things for what they are in an impersonal way. (It’s not a bad idea to practice thinking like a robot for topics that are practical and concrete, like how you’re going to pay this month’s bills. Not everything is personal or emotional.)
Is there a principled train of thought or process in how you get from A to B to Z? Or is it spontaneous based on what mood you’re in? If you’re in a different mood, would you come to a similar or different conclusion?
YOUR BODY (SENSING)
Connect with the five senses you’re experiencing in your body: taste, touch, smell, hearing, and sight. These are neutral experiences before we attach emotional or personal values on them.
Tune into your physical environment. What do you notice that are TRUE and REAL, independently of what you’re feeling/thinking?
Where is your attention at this moment? Within your body, outside of your body, or both? Is your attention in a flexible and balanced state, or is it stuck in one or the other? Practice bringing yourself to what you pay less attention to.
Affirmation for Emotional Balance #2:
I am the MOUNTAIN, my feelings are the WEATHER.
This is a useful visual, possibly from Eastern traditions.
Imagine that you at your core are a great mountain - big, strong, solid, sturdy. No matter what time of year or age, you remain steady and consistent.
External circumstances don’t really make much of an impact on you - actually, you are more likely to make others move around you. Imagine what life would be like if you made others accommodate YOU, not (just) the other way around.
In this picture, your feelings are like the weather. Each day is new; what happened yesterday doesn’t necessarily linger. Yes, you may have general climates that inform general weather patterns, but that still doesn’t change anything about the mountain.
What would your life be like if you were to have such a solid, steady core? What is your TRUE IDENTITY - who you are independently of what happens inside/outside of you?
There are three great lies in life:
I am what I DO.
I am what I HAVE.
I am what I (or others) FEEL.
The great truth that opposes all three? “I am who I am.”
(In math, the concept of “A = A” is called the IDENTITY property. The word IDENTITY has the Latin root “idem” which means SAME.)
You are who you are, despite what you do/did, have/had, or feel/felt. You are who you are STILL, independently of the present and past.
You are who you are, ALREADY, independently of the future, like an acorn is also an oak tree and a bear cub is a bear.
You are who you are, STILL and ALREADY. (another useful mantra for emotional balance)
Affirmation for Emotional Balance #3:
Emotions are MESSENGERS.
Our feelings aren’t random flies that we must simply tolerate. They actually have a designated mission: to tell us what our needs are, and whether these needs are getting met.
A traffic light that’s stuck on just one color is useless (and dangerous). Don’t get attached to a specific emotion in itself, but use it as a GUIDE to tell you what you need to do to take care of yourself.
Each of the BIG 5 Emotions (MAD, SAD, GLAD, SCARED, and NUMB) have corresponding messages about certain kinds of needs and their status.
Emotions are messengers. Receive the memo, they’ll move along their merry way.
When a particular feeling comes up (positive or negative), take a breath and consider,
“What might this emotion be telling me about what I’m needing?”
Remember, achieving emotional balance is not a destination but a continuous process of self-awareness and growth. Integrate these affirmations for emotional balance into your daily life to grow the emotional roots that will help you sustain yourself through various challenges life throws at you.
The BIG Feelings First Aid Kit
Messy feelings spilling out at the WRONG TIME, WRONG PLACE, WRONG WAY?
Grab this free PDF guide that shows you how to handle feelings like a pro so that you can keep moving forward in life!
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Other Blogs on Emotions
© Copyright 2023 Joanne Kim. All rights reserved.
Joanne Kim, Feelings Translator
Hi! I’m a therapist-turned feelings coach who helps Highly Sensitive Persons, Empaths, Enneagram 2s & 4s, etc. turn their BIGGEST feelings into their GREATEST superpower!
They are often the first (or only) person in their family to intuitively process and express feelings; consequently, they are often judged or criticized so that they learn to people please, placate, or perform until they hit a wall.
They’re super familiar with anxiety, guilt, and shame, partly because of an allergic reaction to anger (theirs and others').
Often the super responsible, empathic, and ethical person in their environments, they reach out to me after they're already burned out, resentful in their relationships, or sucked into their shame spiral.
The most common feedback I get from people when I share about how feelings work is,
"Why didn't anyone teach me this in school??"
Hence, I am building a school helping people work WITH their feelings so their feelings work FOR them.