Reverse Bucket List: Recording Wins to Build Momentum
As the year is coming to an end, we might find ourselves reflecting on the goals we set.
Maybe you started with big plans—a new job, better habits, healthier relationships. If you’re still crushing it——congrats!
But the majority of us hit a wall somewhere along the way. Life throws curveballs, and our energy to keep up with those goals simple fizzles.
And when the energy fades, it can be easy to fall into “I’ll never change” or “I don’t even know why I try” mindset.
Sound familiar?
That shame spiral feeds off of this feeling of being “stuck,” unable to make changes and reach our goals.
Some ways I’ve talked about healing this thought process is to view your “cycle” as an upward-moving spiral or to set new intentions rather than goals.
Today’s post will work a little like this. It’s all about recognizing and giving yourself credit for all the little (or big!) changes you’ve already made with a REVERSE BUCKET LIST.
What’s on Your Reverse Bucket List?
We all know the bucket list—it’s that big, dreamy list of things you want to do someday before you “kick the bucket.”
But here’s the thing with bucket lists: most people don’t end up checking off those items.
WHY?
Because those goals are FAR-OFF, UNCLEAR, DISTANT, or NOT ACTIONABLE—all factors that make it hard to take action and make changes.
It’s no wonder they tend to stay in the “maybe someday” category.
Bucket lists focus on a future that can feel so DISTANT we might not even plan to take the steps needed to make those things happen.
A REVERSE bucket list, though, flips the focus.
Instead of looking far into the future, it points to the PAST up into the present.
It’s about RECOGNIZING what you’ve already accomplished—big or small—and celebrating the moments you’re proud of.
When we work on acknowledging small changes, it helps us appreciate our forward movement, even when life feels at a standstill.
How to Create a Reverse Bucket List
Follow these instructions to help you get started on your reverse bucket list, and use the example as a guide!
Take a piece of paper and divide it into two columns, with the right column a little wider than the left.
Pick a starting point from the past—a lot of people start with a year ago. Write the month and year at the top of the left column.
Next, list all the months leading up to now in that left column.
Then, in the right column, start jotting down the things you accomplished or feel proud of for each month. Nothing is too small! Maybe it’s “I said no to extra work” or “I handled a tough situation without falling apart.” If it mattered to you, it belongs here
P.S. You don’t have to go in order—jump around to whatever months come to mind first and fill in the rest as you remember. This list is yours, so do what works for you.
Keep adding to this list every month! At the end of every month, ask yourself:
What did I accomplish this month?
What am I PROUD of?
What CHANGES did I make?
What did I do well?
What good habits did I maintain?
What was a HARD thing I overcame or survived?
It’s okay if your list is full of these negative freedoms if it’s difficult to find the positive freedoms!
Negative freedom = eliminating a hard/negative thing
Positive freedom = gaining a desired thing
If you’re more of a digital person, you can keep your Reverse Bucket List in your phone’s Notes app like I do, and add to it continuously.
That way, it’s easy to add to and review whenever you need a little boost.
Drawing Strength from the Reverse Bucket List
Many of us are quick to credit OTHERS for their growth and achievements while brushing off our own.
If you’re someone who tends to be self-critical and struggle to recognize your own changes and accomplishments, the Reverse Bucket List is here to change that.
It’s a simple tool to remind you that, yes, you have been moving FORWARD, even when things feel like they are the same.
When you make small (even unconscious) changes throughout life, it can be hard to notice the impact they have, and you can still get caught in that “shame cycle” mindset.
But the reverse bucket list captures those micromovements and can serve as a reminder of progress when you feel stuck at different points in life.
So start recoding wins in your own Reverse Bucket List to build momentum for the upcoming year!
Share this with others who might need it too.
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Joanne Kim, Feelings Translator
Hi! I’m a therapist-turned feelings coach who helps Highly Sensitive Persons, Empaths, Enneagram 2s & 4s, etc. turn their BIGGEST feelings into their GREATEST superpower!
They are often the first (or only) person in their family to intuitively process and express feelings; consequently, they are often judged or criticized so that they learn to people please, placate, or perform until they hit a wall.
They’re super familiar with anxiety, guilt, and shame, partly because of an allergic reaction to anger (theirs and others').
Often the super responsible, empathic, and ethical person in their environments, they reach out to me after they're already burned out, resentful in their relationships, or sucked into their shame spiral.
The most common feedback I get from people when I share about how feelings work is,
"Why didn't anyone teach me this in school??"
Hence, I am building a school helping people work WITH their feelings so their feelings work FOR them.